| JFS of Metrowest
Continuing
Connections
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Greetings, 
Welcome to the July/August edition of the
Continuing Connections newsletter. We hope you and
your families are having a wonderful summer!
This time of year calls to mind a quote by
William D. Tammeaus: "You don't really understand
human nature unless you know why a child on a
merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time
around - and why his parents will always wave
back." Please send us pictures of
merry-go-rounds and other places and
activities you've been enjoying. We'd love
to feature them in an upcoming newsletter.
Our personal story for this edition was sent
to us by Michele Pierce. Thank you Michele! We're
also excited to announce the first edition of a
new column in the newsletter called "Peace of My
Mind" by Emma. Thanks Emma!
Thanks also to the families
of Olivia and Gattie Day, Anna Marie
Flanagan, Connor Geshwiler, Morgan Pierce, Liam
Walsh, and Allie White for sharing their photos
with us.
And don't forget to mark your calendars for
the Adoption Choices Picnic at Davis Farmland on
September 21st! Looking forward to seeing
you then.
- Lucia and
Gail
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| Welcome
Home! |
|
 We are happy to
announce the following recent arrivals.
Anna Marie (born March 27, 2008)
joined the family of Sharon and Tim Flanagan on
March 28,
2008
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| Personal
Story |
|
 "I'm sorry. The baby was
born a week ago." The out-of-town caseworker had
tracked down the birthmother's doctor and
confirmed that mother and son had been released
from the hospital.
We were stunned,
then confused. Lastly, feelings of loss and
emptiness settled in. There are really no words to
describe this kind of mourning. It hardly seems
real when there is nothing tangible to validate
it. Questions kept playing over and over in our
minds. Why didn't she just tell us? Is he all
right? How do we move on? How do we explain this
to our 3-year-old daughter?
About two
weeks later, still dizzily trying to get a grip on
the last few days' events, Dale called.
"There is a baby--a girl." Whoa. Now what? Not
only did we question our readiness to move on,
there were issues with this birth that were out of
our comfort zone. We thought about it for a few
days. Dale and Raquel were patient, understanding,
and willing to provide as much support as we
needed. But it was all too much, too fast. We
still were thinking about the son we had lost. So,
no we were not ready. It was a relief to have made
a decision. But it was not settled.
The next day, Father's Day, we sat
eating breakfast. "I think we made a mistake," I
said. "Me too." my husband replied. I
quickly left a message for Dale, and then we
anxiously awaited her call, hoping that other
arrangements had not been made.
The
rest is a blur until the moment we laid eyes on
our daughter, sleeping peacefully, sweet, tiny,
and beautiful. In that moment I felt a
feeling of satisfaction, fullness, and an acute
sense that yes, this was the baby who was meant to
join our family.
Morgan just turned
seven. She is vivacious, stubborn, and extremely
kind-hearted. It is impossible to imagine life
without her. Sometimes the path we are on takes
some turns we do not expect. But in the end it is
certain to present us with much more than we could
ever have
anticipated.
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| From Dale and
Raquel |
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 It's time to fill up that
beach bag with books for summer reading!
Here are some of our recommendations for
children's books about adoption:
It's O.K. to be Different
by Todd Parr, ages 6 and up
Why Didn't She Keep
Me? Answers to the Questions
Every Adopted Child
Asks by Barbara Burlingham-Brown, M.S.
ages 4-8
Tell Me Again About the Night I was
Born by Jamie Lee Curtis, ages 2 -
8
Never Never Never Will She Stop Loving
You by Jolene Durrant, ages 4-8
Who Am I? And Other Questions of Adopted
Kids by Charlene C. Giannetti, ages
10-18
A Mother for Choco by Keiko Kasza,
ages 2-8
We're Different, We're the Same by
Bobbi Janes Kates, ages 2-6
Over the Moon: An Adoption Tale by
Karen Katz, ages 2 - 6
Horace by Holly Keller, ages 2 -
8
The Color of Us by Karen Katz, ages
4 -8
The Day We Met You by Phoebe
Koehler, ages 3 and up
How it Feels to be Adopted by Jill
Krementz, ages 8 and up
Brown Like Me by Noelle Lamperti,
ages 4-8
I Love You Like Crazy Cakes by Rose
Lewis, ages 4-8
Families are Different by Nina
Pellegrini, ages 4-8
Happy Adoption Day! by John
McCutcheon, ages 2-6
Did My First Mother Love Me? by
Kathryn Ann Miller, ages 4 - 8
The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn,
ages 4-10
One Wonderful You by
Francie Portnoy, ages 4 - 10
All Kinds of Families by
Norma Simon, ages 2 - 8
Through Moon and Stars and
Night Skies by Ann Turner, ages 2 -
8
The Best Single Mom in the
World by Mary Zisk, ages 3 -
8 |
| Peace of My
Mind
by Emma |
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|
Hello to all of you first time readers! Thank
you for taking time to actually read my column. It
will be appearing in each edition of the JFS of
Metrowest Continuing Connections newsletter, and
will be changing throughout the year. I truly hope
you will enjoy it, and find it helpful and
informative.
Parents, I know
you have questions. And FOR SURE I don't have all
the answers. But hey, don't you think your kids
might have a question or two as well? How about
you read this not only for you, but let's give
your kids a listen as well, eh? See what
they feel, and see if they have questions that
maybe you just can't answer. That's where I come
in. So here I go repeating myself. I DO NOT HAVE
ALL THE ANSWERS. But I do have some, or a maybe a
little more than some, and do have first hand
experience with adoption. Plus, I'm a little
closer in age to your children than you are, so I
just might be feeling some of what your children
might be feeling. (Hint as to my identity.)
By now, you are probably
wondering who I am, because so far the only clue
you have as to my identity is that my name is
Emma. However, you could make several inferences
about who I am, just based on my name, and the
fact that you are reading the Continuing
Connections newsletter. You could gather that I
was female, and probably have some experience with
adoption. For instance, I could be adopted. Or, I
could be an adoptive parent. OR I could be a birth
mother who made an adoption plan for her child.
You don't know which, but you could make an
accurate guess based on where this article is
located. It is not in a school newspaper, it is
not in The New York Times, and it is certainly not
in Reader's Digest. You may find yourself
thinking. At this point, your head must be chock
full of questions. You're probably looking for
some answers. And I got 'em, right here.
First off, yes, my name is Emma.
No, it is not a fake identity. But something you
might not have guessed is that I will be turning
thirteen in only about four months. Yes, I
am only twelve years old. Whoa. Right? I'm betting
that you weren't guessing that. However, now I
would like to backtrack. I DO NOT like it when
people refer to me as "only" twelve years old.
Twelve years is a long time. It's longer than any
one president has ever been in office, except for
Roosevelt, who served just over twelve years
before he died in office.
I suppose you might still have
some questions lingering around in that head of
yours? Well, here are a few more answers.
I am not an adoptive parent. That
doesn't mean I do or don't plan to be one, but
right now I am certainly in no way possible in the
position to raise a baby. So that leaves one other
slot open. Well, two actually. But no, I am not a
birth mother. I am adopted. I have an open
adoption, and am very in touch with my birth
family. That's birth family, not just my birth
parents. I have a very open relationship not
only with my birth parents, but also with my birth
grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and even
half brother, Alden, who I have a very special
bond with. Now that I've just given you a huge
dose of new information, you probably have brand
new questions that take the place of the old. But
let's just put a hold on all the birth family
stuff for just one minute. Don't worry, I will go
into more detail later, but right now, if I did,
this one article would take up WAY too much space
in the newsletter, and I'll save that goldmine of
information for another time. Let's take a little
time to right now get to know the me who is about
to start junior high school, loves to dance, and
has a soft spot for Jim Sturgess, the movie
actor.
I live with my parents Jim and
Dale in a nice neighborhood in a somewhat modern
house with cathedral ceilings. I sleep with my
little, white, fuzzy, West Highland White Terrier,
(Better known as a "Westie") McDuff. He gives me
lots of love which I always return, usually in
much stronger doses. I have three best friends,
and I love them lots, too. During the summer
you can find me swimming, riding my bike, or just
kickin' back and chillaxin'. Come November, my
body is filled with little tingles of excitement,
because on a special November day in 2008, a
certain Massachusetts girl is becoming a teenager.
And two days after the eventful day, happy
memories fill my house, and especially my parents,
for on November 5th, thirteen years ago, a happy
couple pulled into their driveway, with a little
sleeping bundle that they would be giving all
their love to until the day they died. During the
winter I still love the magical feeling you get
when the first snowfall comes, and also the
feeling of hatred when the thermometer reads 30
degrees in May. On particularly nasty days, I love
to indulge myself with the taste of late night
chocolaty Nutella sandwiches.
So now, as we come to the end of
the debut of my column in Continuing Connections,
I would like to thank you for reading, and be sure
to spread the word: PEACE!
AND DON'T FORGET! Send in your
questions! I would love to help, and don't
think I don't know you have questions. Believe me,
I know. I also have questions, so you are not
alone out there. Just please, PLEASE send them to
me care of Lucia at lcarballo@jfsmw.org.
Please put "FOR EMMA" in the subject
line.
SO! In conclusion, if you've
got questions, which I know you do, send them in!
I will do my very best to answer them fully and
honestly, and, with your permission, might even
post your question with my answer in the upcoming
Continuing Connections newsletter. That way, other
people who might have been a little shy and
decided not to send in a question might have had
the same question as you, and then will see it
posted in the newsletter, along with my answer,
and maybe get up the courage to ask a different
question of theirs that had been bothering them
for quite some time.
I hope this article has been
pleasurable to read, and maybe even a little
informative, and I hope you will read it in future
editions of the newsletter. Just remember if you
want your questions answered, SEND THEM
IN!
Peace
everybody. |
| Agency News |
|
 JFS of Metrowest is proud
to announce that over the past year:
- 66 Metrowest residents were sworn in as new
U.S. Citizens through our Citizenship
program.
- 25 Fifth grade girls became young female
engineers through our Wilson Wizards
program.
- Over 1,500 elders and caregivers were
touched by our dedicated elder services team.
- Healthy Partners participants walked over
1,000,000 steps.
- A new eating disorder prevention program
brought mothers and daughters together.
- And of course, our amazing Adoption Choices
program continued to help build families through
both international and domestic
adoption.
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| Events and
News |
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Parents' Groups
Join us
for one of our parents' groups:
Day
Group - meets at JFS, 475 Franklin Street,
Suite 101, Framingham
Evening Group
-meets at Starbucks in Framingham Relax with other
adoptive parents, Lucia, and Gail as we share
stories, questions and enjoy each other's
company.
Any questions? Contact Gail at ggregory@jfsmw.org Watch your
email for specific
dates. ACTIVITIES TAKING
PLACE
ELSEWHERE Korean
Adoption Circle PlaygroupFor families
who have adopted from Korea. Korean
Presbyterian Church, 2 Main Street,
Hopkinton. Meets first and third Fridays of
every month -- 10 a.m. - noon. $1 donation
per child. Together in
MotionAdoptive Family Mixer at the
Together in Motion kids tumble gym and adult
exercise studio in Arlington. The mixers are
held each Monday morning from 9:30 am - 11:00
am. $5.00 per child. For more
information call 781-643-1377 or visit www.togetherinmotion.com The
Rainbow Connection PlaygroupSt.
Joseph Parish Center, 145 Holliston St.,
Medway. 508-533-5820 Meets third Tuesday
of every month - 9:15 - 10:45 a.m. For
parents and their children looking to make
meaningful connections with others raising
minority children in the
suburbs. |
| Links and
Resources |
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For parents
Send us your favorite websites and
resources!
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| About Adoption
Choices |
|
Since 1982, Adoption Choices, a non-profit,
licensed adoption program, has been providing
Massachusetts families with comprehensive adoption
services. Our program is designed to meet the
needs of the adoptive parents, birth parents, and
adoptees by providing a wide range of educational
and counseling services.
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Please send us comments and suggestions; we want
this to be your newsletter. Let us know about
books, movies, etc. you think others would enjoy.
Keep us informed of adoption/family related events in
your area and we'd be happy to share
them.
Forward this email to friends, family
and colleagues by using the "forward me" link at the
bottom of the page.
We would like to thank
the following people who contributed to this issue:
Michele Pierce, Dale Eldridge, Raquel Woodard, and Emma.
Sincerely,
Lucia
Carballo and Gail Gregory
Jewish Family Service of Metrowest
phone: 508-875-3100
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